End of My Rope

Over the last few weeks, I have received hundreds, LITERAL HUNDREDS of spam comments. Most of them end up on this post, but they have been scattered throughout the blog. They all cover the same thing: a mythical cure for whatever ails you, including death. Yes, you can come back from death - if you can pull your rigored finger out of your casket long enough to dial this 17-digit number to who the hell knows where, and talk to Dr. ABC about your non-beating heart. With prayer, and a few herbs and chicken bones, you too, can be cured. 

Typically I laugh things like this off. One, two, even ten comments - I'm fine. But this is excessive, and annoying, and largely untraceable. Even if I wanted to complain about it - to whom do I write the letter? Dr. ABC? Do I call the 17-digit number and tell them that my affliction happens to be a headache they've caused with hundreds of spam comments?

Celina Jolly, what a great name. Celina Jolly, remember that one folks. She was cured of HIV. I assume Celina is a woman? I know she has an aunt. The Aunty had Herpes. Also cured. I wonder if she has a mailman who has Gout? A debt-collector who has an astigmatism? A friend at church who suffers from TMJ? I mean, she's telling me (and you) everything else there is to know about her life. Lay it on me. What else can your herbal doctor cure, Celina?

Amanda, also from the USA. Maybe she and Celina live next to each other? She was cured of Herpes. Wait, is Amanda Celina's aunt!? NO! Can't be - she went to a different Doctor. Maybe they office out of the back of the same van? I mean, it's possible. Who's name is first on the door though, that's what I want to know.

Lynne, she wants EVERYONE to know that she was cured (by yet a different Doctor) of her Herpes. On a side note, what the hell makes people think I care about their Herpes? Anyway, her "doctor", he's truly a miracle worker. The ultimate healer of our time. He can even cure the dreaded MALE MENOPAUSE. Thank goodness! Finally! I thought these hot flashes would last me forever. You know, when my ovaries started acting up - that's when I know my masculinity had hit the fan. He can also cure obesity. Cured. Gone. Never obese again.

Let me be VERY clear. 

VERY. 

I am not making light of illnesses that are listed here. That's not what this is about. This is about spam comments offering access to quack medicine being left on an interior design blog. 

What you have to understand, is that like all of you, I don't have time to shuffle through these comments - deleting the spam, etc..  I figured the reason they were being left was because I had no filters, and they could leave them without having to be recognized by some captcha software. I didn't want to inhibit REAL PEOPLE from leaving comments, so I didn't turn that on.

I simply decided to moderate comments going forward. Now, I get dozens of emails a day all about how Lynne, and Amanda, and Celine have all been cured of some disease which otherwise has no cure. And all I have to do is Whatsapp Dr.'s ABC, 123, ZYX, and LMNOP.

Please tell me that I'm not the only one going through this. Does anyone know of a way to make it stop? I'm one more spam comment away from locking comments altogether. I don't know what else to do, I'm honesty at the end of my rope ... and I can't imagine there is a cure for that!